A For Adventure : Adventures In Parenting

A For Adventure was originally intended as a series to write about the outings Rocket Baby and I enjoy together. To be honest it's probably the only thing I have going for this blog that sets us apart. As Trevor and I enter into a new adventure in parenting, I thought that a parenting specific edition would be fun and hopefully inspiring to other parents.

On December 2nd, our darling Rocket turned 2. I knew when I was pregnant that there was something truly special about this boy of ours. Aside from the way he healed our hearts after a pregnancy loss, or the way his name came to be, I just knew there was something else.

Rocket Baby has always been spirited, sensitive, and particular in nature. So much so that I wrote out an extensive list of his behaviors to discuss with his Dr. I honestly believed he may have a high functioning form of Asperger's. After discussing my concerns his Dr very confidently told me he does not believe Rocket Baby has Asperger's, but he is highly sensitive. Well, duh! I knew that! I just didn't know this was something Dr's actually "diagnosed". I assumed a diagnosis would be Asperger's.

I'm so thankful that Trevor and I have chosen a path of peaceful parenting. We do not hit or spank, we take Rocket Baby's feelings into consideration and we've always tried to accommodate his sensitive spirit. Over the past 6 weeks, after suffering another pregnancy loss, Rocket Baby's behavior took a major turn. He was very, very aware of what was going on, although at not even 2 he certainly didn't understand. He has been hitting, spitting, throwing things, and not responding well to any forms of peaceful discipline we have tried. Yes some of this stuff can be chalked up to him being a toddler, but unless you have a highly sensitive child, it's a bit hard to understand.

We try our best to be patient, kind, and respectful. These are all things I want our son to know well. It's so hard to do when you're basically at your wits end trying to redirect negative behaviors. I belong to a Babywearing group with some seriously awesome mothers and I saw someone recommend The Highly Sensitive Child by Elaine Aron. After visiting amazon and taking the short quiz determining if your child is HS, I knew I needed this book. I knew I needed it even more when his Dr said he is definitely HS. So today we stopped at Barnes and Noble and picked up a copy. I'm so anxious to dive in and will be doing a book review and my first giveaway after completing this book.

In the meantime, if you believe you may have a HSC, I would encourage you to take the short quiz and educate yourself on the best ways to parent a HSC. I truly believe God gives us kids to grow us and shape is into better people. Rocket Baby has taught me so much patience and understanding. I would not be the person I am without him and above all else, I want to parent him the way he deserves. The way he needs me to parent.

One last thing. If your child is highly sensitive, you are not alone!

Simplifying Gift Giving

So I'm sure most of you have hear the cute little rhyme that has been circulating for a few years. The basic premise is to simplify gift giving.

• Something you want
• Something you need
• Something to wear
• Something to read

I've decided to adapt this into our own family dynamic. I want Rocket Baby to grow up being appreciative of the things he has. I want him to be gracious and kind and generous. Teaching those qualities begins early and a perfect time to teach this is during the holidays. 

I remember growing up and having the best Christmas mornings imaginable. Tons of presents, wrapping paper and bows and ribbons littering the living room, and a barrage of new games and toys to occupy us ll day long. And while those memories are fantastic and I treasure them, I also think they set my siblings and I up for disappointment as adults. Christmas isn't as epic as it was when we were kids. Now we have bills and families and practical expenses that don't make it easy to splurge and go all out. 

I believe that this season is to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ, whom we believe to be our Lord and Saviour. There is so much focus on getting that the reasons for giving are lost in translation. I believe we give to reflect Christlikeness. To celebrate a birth of a Saviour. Giving shouldn't come with conditions, long lists, and frustration. Giving shouldn't be stressful. It shouldn't give you a headache. It should come from a pure heart and be received with gratitude and grace. 

For me the idea of simplifying Christmas is to grow Rocket Baby to know and understand that we celebrate to honor Jesus. Our pastor mentioned two Sundays ago that we are blessed to be a blessing to others. This is especially true suing the holidays. I want things like volunteering and giving to others to be commonplace for Rocket Baby. I want him to look forward to helping out at the local shelter then to open a ridiculous amount of gifts he really doesn't need. 

Want. Need. Wear. Read. Four things. The most important gift we can give him is a humble heart and a eagerness to do good things.